Cool Nick Names

• Why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?
• When cows laugh, does milk come out of their nose?
• Gravity always wins
• The easiest way to avoid a hangover is to just stay drunk
• There are some that are wise and others that are otherwise
• I'm not an alcoholic. I am a drunk. Alcoholics go to meetings
• Buy land, they have quit making it!
• Don't judge a man by his boxers, it's what's inside that counts
• I'm not suffering from insanity, I'm enjoying every minute of it
• Eat healthy, exercise more, still die
• Politicians prefer unarmed peasants
• Time is what keeps things from happening all at once
• Women/Men who seek to be equal with men/women lack ambition
• What happens if you get scared half to death... twice?
• Smile, it makes people wonder what you're up too..
• Opinions are like assholes... Everyone's got one, and they stink
• Sometimes I wish I were you, just so I could be friends with me
• Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most
• If marriage is outlawed, only outlaws will have inlaws
• I don't have to be careful, I've got a gun